Can I Leave My Littles?

Well, shit is getting real. We leave for Ireland in TWO DAYS! I am beyond excited. Seriously. This is something Matt and I have talked about doing since back when we were dating almost 7 years ago.

Why are we going now? Well, after the events of this past year, we decided that life is too short to pay bills and die. So, we decided to go for it and buy the tickets.

For months now we have been planning, researching, and prepping, finding care for the littles, making lists upon lists, and getting the necessary supplies. And it is almost here...but can I leave my littles?

Part of me thinks we are crazy for going without Emmett and Attley. I have officially been home full time with them for a month and it has been life changing. I fall more in love with them every single day. The thought of leaving them for TWELVE days is terrifying. I'm literally terrified. Am I a crazy, have to be with my kids constantly mom? No. I love a night out or a few nights away, but 12 days seems like a lot.

Then while I am on this crazy mom train, my mind goes even farther into the negative...what if something bad happens? What if we never make it back? And then I stop myself. My mantra for this year has been the word “faith.” I come back to this word daily and repeat it in my head constantly. I need to have faith.

Faith that the kids will be alright and have a blast with their grandparents.

Faith that this trip is going to be such a blessing for Matt and I.

Faith that we will return safely.

Faith.

Faith.

Faith.

Our reality is what our mind makes it and I don’t want to have this trip of a lifetime tarnished by fear, worry, or doubt. So, I will continue to repeat that mantra in my head, squeeze my littles a bit more than normal, and get ready to jump on a plane for an exciting adventure with the love of my life.